Is your marriage on the rocks?
Statistics say that in America today, more than 50% of all marriages will end in up “on the rocks.” The divorce rate in this country is staggering, and the consequences of all these broken lives and homes are evident in every part of our society. Sadly, statistics also show that there isn’t much difference in the divorce rate between couples who attend church, and those who don’t.
However, when it comes to marriage, the divorce rate is not the only tragedy. To many couples, all being married has come to mean is not being divorced. Even many Christians think that as long as they don’t have legal papers certifying a broken relationship, God won’t know it’s broken. Somewhere Christians have gotten the idea that a hurtful, unhealthy marriage is more pleasing to God than a divorce.
The Bible makes it clear that God hates divorce, but God also hates the broken-down relationships that masquerade as marriages. Make no mistake, God does hate divorce, but He hates and grieves over lousy marriages, too.
How can you keep your marriage off the rocks?
So, what’s the answer? Can relationships headed for the rocks be repaired? And what can couples whose relationships aren’t broken do to keep them off of the rocks? The answer is that marriages must be built solidly on the only Rock that is unmovable, and that Rock is Jesus Christ.
A marriage built on “The Rock” is a marriage where both spouses don’t just go to church, but where both are completely committed to the Lordship of Jesus in their lives. It means both spouses are totally surrendered to doing things His way.
All through scripture, God gives promises and warnings. The promises are found in verses like Psalm 128:1 where it says, “Blessed are all who fear (depend on) the Lord and walk in His ways.” And in Psalm 81:13, God says, “If my people would but listen to Me, if Israel would follow my ways, how quickly would I subdue their enemies.”
But God also says in Hosea 4:6, “My people are destroyed from lack of knowledge.” It seems that nothing much has changed in our day. The lives and marriages of God’s people are still being destroyed because they are either ignorant of, or chose to ignore, the ways of God.
Follow the instructions
Many couples today live like they’ve forgotten that marriage was God’s idea in the first place. He thought it up, He created it, and only He knows how it works best. Products are purchased in this country every day with directions written clearly on the packaging which says, “For best results, follow instructions of maker.” If those are important words when it comes to an appliance or even cough syrup, how much more important are they when it comes to marriage?
The Bible says in Psalm 127:1, “Except the Lord build the house, its builders labor in vain.” God is saying in this verse, that when it comes to building a life, a marriage, a family, or a home, He must be the general contractor, or all your hard work will be for nothing.
In Matthew 7:24-27, Jesus compared a person who ignores His words to a foolish man who builds his house on shifting sand. But He said a person who embraces the Word of God is like a wise man who builds his house on a rock.
We live in a politically correct, morally apathetic culture that says there are no longer any absolutes. In other words, what is truth for me isn’t necessarily truth for you, so do what you think is right in your own eyes. That lie is the shifting sand Jesus was talking about, and it will destroy your marriage just as surely as Hurricane Ike destroyed the Gulf Coast.
Jesus said in John 14:6, “I am the way, THE truth, and the life.” He is the only unmovable, unchangeable Rock, and any foundation for your life and marriage other than Jesus Christ will be as unstable as building a house on shifting sand.
Which voice will you follow?
There are many voices in the world vying for your attention today. Which one are you listening to? In Elijah’s day, he confronted this issue and said, “How long are you going to waver between two opinions? If the Lord is God, follow Him; but if Baal is God, follow him” (1 Kings 18:21). In other words, “it’s time to quit playing games–the stakes are too high.”
How about you? Are you wavering between God’s Word and the opinions of the world? Upon what foundation are you building your house? Are you ready to say with the Psalmist, “I WILL listen to what God the Lord will say” (Psalm 85:8)?
Jesus is the unchangeable Rock and the only sure foundation for any marriage. If your marriage is going to “stay off the rocks,” then you must be deliberate about doing things God’s way. This is a simple but profound truth: You can’t do marriage successfully on your own. In fact, you can’t do ANYTHING in life successfully on your own.
The created (you and me) can only be truly successful when it brings honor to its Creator by fulfilling the purpose for which it was created in the first place.
God’s purpose in creating you and me was so we could live in a dependent relationship with Him. Therefore, the only way to be successful in any area of life is to bring honor to God by living a dependent life on Him.
Doing life and doing marriage God’s way means being totally dependent on Jesus to meet all your needs, no matter how large or small. It means depending on Him completely for wisdom and direction regarding the decisions you must make every day. It also means being obedient to His Word, regardless of how foolish it may seem to the rest of the world.
#1 essential to build your marriage on The Rock
To build your marriage on The Rock, you must purpose in your heart to do things God’s way, not your own way, and not the world’s way. Begin today. Commit your heart to the Lord. Commit to doing things His way. By His grace, strength, and wisdom, you can build your marriage on The Rock.
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Susan Gadd is a wife, mom, grandmother, and Bible teacher. She and her opposites-attract husband Emory have been married 47 years, and they have enjoyed teaching and mentoring hundreds of couples for over 25 years at Sagemont Church in Houston, Texas.
Copyright © 2013. Susan Gadd.
All Rights Reserved. Used by permission.
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